Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Choices

Hmm....choices. They happen everyday right? Grande or Tall; Blue jeans or slacks; call-in or go to work, we all do it. One major "choice" for the LGBTIQ community is our sexual orientation. After a very stirring conversation with a family member earlier today, I decided it was time to debunk the most popular gay myth of them all: "Homosexuality is a choice." Now, many of you are thinking, "Yeah, its a choice but I still don't judge" or you're thinking, "It's absolutely a choice and a wrong one at that" or maybe you're one of the few open-minded, educated people of the world and are thinking, "Why would anyone ever think it was a choice?" The correct response is the latter of the three. No, homosexuality is not a choice. I did not wake up one day and all of a sudden think that Bob over there is a real cutie. There are many theories (real theories, like the kind tested and proven by scientists and psychologists) as to why all of us fags like each other. One of the out-dated but still plausible ideas is that in the early stages of childhood development, a person attains the affinity for the same sex. Many psychologists and psychoanalysts are now saying that if this theory is true, sexual orientation is determined within the first two years of life. A problem with that is where do some of us get the exposure? Harvey Milk said something to the affect of, "I was raised in a straight, catholic family. All the men around me were straight. If my orientation was based on that, I'd be the straightest man who ever lived." The second theory, this is backed by mounds of scientific evidence, is the genetic theory. Many people who are not well read on the subject may think it isn't true because they have not pinpointed a specific gene. No, they have not narrowed it down to one gene and there is a very plausible reason for that. The "gay" gene is best described as similar to the gene that determines skin tone. In fact, there's a whole group of genes that determines how light or dark one's skin will be. The best way to think of it is, if a black person and a white person have a child, that child will not be either black or white. Most likely, the child will be a mixture of the skin tones. That's because the different genes all meld into this new person. So one may say, "How does that relate to sexuality?" Basically, when the parents genes mix, you have a higher chance of being gay or straight, with some grey area in between. That is why there are so many different types of orientation. It's just like skin tone. Make sense? I know that probably wasn't my most coherent blog but I'm a little fatigued. So what have we learned this time? Being gay is not a choice. It would be so much easier to stay straight considering all the crap gays are put through when coming out. We don't really know why we are the way we are but what we do know is that we have to be true to ourselves. I've never made such an upset in my life over a simple choice. I am gay and have always been gay and will always be gay. That is a fact, a reality in my life. I love myself and my fellow queers. We are all unique, beautiful and incredibly strong. If you're out there and struggling with your orientation, we are all here with open arms and words of encouragement. We will have our ears ready to hear and our hearts ready to love. That is our identity, how we survive. I'll leave with another quote from one of our most beloved leaders, Harvey Milk, "If a bullet should go through my head, let that bullet go through every closet door." I love you all and thank you again for reading.

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